denial

my mind isn't equipped to understand what I feel when I see you.

am i imagining the butterflies in my stomach?

the somersaults my heart does, that little spark of joy?

i don't remember when i started to suspect that i had fallen

was it the first time i saw you?

with your tousled black hair and that smile you flashed at me? when you sat there like someone i dreamt into being?

or was it when you laughed at the tales i told, when you made me feel like my life was a story worth narrating?

my mind isn't equipped to understand what i feel when i see you.

it hides behind a wall of denial, refusing to accept that i may have fallen-

no. no, i have not. a passing obsession, a trivial infatuation, a frivolous fancy, if you will, but I have not fallen.

but haven't i?

haven't i fallen for your witty remarks, your sarcasm, your lively presence?

haven't i fallen for the way you look at life, the way you smile with that spark in your eyes?

my mind isn't equipped to understand what I feel when I see you,

but my heart is.

i have fallen for your witty remarks, your sarcasm, your lively presence. i have fallen for the way you look at life, the way you smile with that spark in your eyes, and i know nothing could ever come of it

you will only ever be the muse to my odes, the sprig of green on barren land, but never to be called mine

and that is a poet's greatest plight.